fallen: how to lose your wings in 12 easy steps

breathe in

that fucking helicopter again at the exact same time.

i shall kill. yes i will.

actually i had another purpose for this. i was going to explain some of the fiction for some of you that just don't know me that well. i have had this same story running through my head since i was like 16. i have written crappy poetry, on the fly episodes, and one really good, in my opinion, short story that all lay the groundwork for some of the stuff that you see here. its great that i have the concept, but i don't have the patience and i just can't get into their world often enough for me to really turn it in to the next great novel. so if you have the desire, read all the different ventilate sections and you will see that there are a couple of recurring characters and scenes. i know that they don't make sense, but in a sick way they are all right in their place in my head. yeah thats how fucked up i am. like the email one, which i still need to go and edit because there are a whole bunch of typos, on the outside you might not know how it fits in to the two people on the train, which doesn't quite fit in with the girl in the gypsy caravan, which really doesn't relate to the doorway between worlds and what the fuck is the shit with the council, or the magnate. who is jason, who is gabriel, who is michael, who is vyvyan. i will tell you one thing. they are all bad people. there is only one person in these stories on this page that i would say has multiple redeeming qualities, and i won't tell you who that is. lets just say i do have a draft going of a rewrite of the very first dream i had about this. and yes, all of these have been inspired by dreams. bad ones.

lets give you a hint. just a little one...

ventilate(FICTION)

there is a house on lincoln. you know the one with the dirt lot for a front lawn. its not really that bad of a house, may need some repairs but otherwise its in pretty good shape. i heard that there was one of those murder suicide things in there, you know some guy pops his wife and the puts one in his forehead out of guilt. that's why it won't sell.

when i was little we used to walk past there everyday and look in the windows and everything. there's still furniture in there, but most of it looks like there is a four inch pile of dust on it. it never really scared me, but some of the other kids would say its haunted or that stuff. they used to dare people to crawl in the basement window, it was broken and just big enough for your average 12 year old to squeeze through. i did it once and didn't really see anything. i did find one cool thing.

i walked through the upstairs part. i remember that the floors were really creaky, like obnoxious loud. it was well lit because it was like 4 in the afternoon and none of the windows were boarded up. like i said not scary. there was this long hallway and at the end it turned a corner into a room. that room was the only room in the house that didn't have anything. no carpets, no furniture, nothing. well not quite. in the center was this weird looking stove, like one of those woodburning ones. it was black, and the only really weird thing was that it looked like someone had removed the chimney. on the side there was a plaque, just had the letters b.r.d.n. i always remember that. anyway, i just thought it was funny looking, it just didn't look right. still, wasn't creepy or anything. i opened the little latch in the front and looked in. that's where i found the knife.

i still can see it just like that day. the knife was the most beautiful thing that i had ever seen. it was silver and gleamed like it had just been polished. i guess since it was in that stove it had been protected from the dust that had settled in the rest of the house. it wasn't all fancy or anything, just smooth and, i guess, pretty.

no this is the weird part. i walked back down, knife in hand, and in the front room of the house there was this guy. he smiled at me, and i remember i didn't feel scared, even then. he just smiled. he told me his name was jason and he thanked me for getting his knife. he walked up, sorta messed up my hair, then he asked if i wanted to sit down. i remember looking out the front window, and all the kids i had been with were gone. he told me they had went home like 20 minutes before, that i had been in the house for over an hour. he came in to check on me when i didn't come out. he told me that this was a very dangerous place and that i was very brave for coming in here by myself. i never really got that. he then told me that this was just the first time that we were to meet, and there would be two other times, and not to be surprised when i saw him again. i will never forget him. he was tall and blonde and muscular. he looked like a model or something. i think his hair was highlights to tell the truth. then he like stood up, and his smile went away. he told me i had to leave.

next thing i knew i was walking home. i didn't remember leaving the house, or what happened until i was like a block away from my house. i've never really told anyone that story before. but its just weird. when i met you tonight i just couldn't stop thinking about that day. sorry if that sounds weird. it's just that you are just the hottest guy that i have seen here in a long time, and i don't know you are just so easy to talk to. you are such a good listener. sorry, i know i'm psycho.

"that doesn't sound weird at all, kent. now tell me about your friend jonas. and while you're at it can i have his email address?"